Everyone is different, everyone copes to the news in different ways, and how you feel in the early days is very personal. You may be in shock and even feel numb, or feel anger, or very weepy, or maybe unable to cry at all, you may even find you calmly go about your daily tasks, or you may have difficulty in sleeping.  Some may find that they are completely unable to cope and feel distraught, and may need a lot of practical and emotional support from those around. All of this is quite normal.

Weeks and months after, you may feel agitated, and you even may become very active and focus on doing things, the overriding need to busy, like cleaning out the whole house, but sometimes the agitation can result in symptoms of anxiety and panic. Sometimes you may even feel that you are going mad,  because you have strange experiences, which relate to seeing, hearing or even feeling your son or daughter, don’t worry these experiences are not uncommon following the death of someone you love.

It is important to recognise that other people outside the immediate family and friends may find it very difficult to express how they feel and as a result may avoid contact, or act strangely or out of character, this is not because they don’t care, but because they don’t know what to do or say when faced with your grief. This is a natural response, as words cannot always express the sorrow some people may feel, sometimes other people do not realise that it can take a long time to begin to recover from the loss of a loved one.

Coming to terms with the loss is a very gradual process which can take a considerable time. People usually find that gradually they are able to get on with their lives and think a little less about the person they have lost. It is important not to feel guilty, this is part of the normal healing process, and is not in any way disloyal to the memory of your son or daughter.  

Useful Links 
Cruse Bereavement Care Scotland
Cruse Bereavement Care Scotland is a national organisation which offers a free confidential bereavement counselling service to people of all ages.  Cruse have regional teams around Scotland, but operate a National Helpline which will put you in contact with your local regional team.
Tel: 0845 600 2227
 Web site: www.crusescotland.org.uk

Moodjuice
Moodjuice Forth Valley is a web site designed to offer information and advice to those experiencing troublesome thoughts, feelings and actions. From the site you are able to print off other self-help guides covering conditions such as depression, anxiety, stress, panic and sleep problems. In the site you can explore various self-help materials, that can offer you support and information which will allow you to help yourself.
Web site: www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk

Breathing Space
Breathing Space is a free, confidential phone line you can call when you're feeling down.

Tel: 0800 83 85 87
Web site: www.breathingspacescotland.co.uk

 Samaritans
Samaritans provides confidential emotional support, 24 hours a day for people who are experiencing feelings of distress or despair, The offer support if you are worried about something feel upset or confused, or you just want to talk to someone.
 
Tel: 08457 90 90 90
Web site: www.samaritans.org